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Phoenix, Arizona, United States
Retro wifey, mommy to a princess, editor, PETA fanatic, and I Love Lucy!

Sunday, July 15, 2012



Have You Ever:

*Cleaned poop off the wall, and the cat?

*Went to give the homeless man some change in your wallet, and afterwards he looks at you like your crazy because you just handed him a Chuck E. Cheese token?

*Watched I-Carly and SpongeBob, on PURPOSE?

*Been searching for a free outlet anywhere in the house to plug in the vacuum but they are all occupied with rechargable batteries going at all times of the day and night?

*Taken an hour to get ready to leave the house for a 5 minute errand?

*Kissed the mailman when you just SCORED a HUGE Huggies diaper coupon in the mail?

*Singing that song repeatedly in your head, then you finally realize it comes from Dora The Explorer and your singing along with the map?  WAIT, a map can sing?

*Changed the code word for "wanna fool around" to now, "wanna lay the baby down in her bed?"

*Taken your first pee break in 8 hours, only to hear an almighty "crash" from the living room just as your pants hit your ankles?

*Slaved over a hot stove and then had your cooking "snubnosed" and left on the plate to rot?  Even though you made the same thing 2 weeks ago and the plate was half empty before you could say "SLOW DOWN?"

*Escorted a screaming naked child and 15 tub toys from the bathtub, because God forbid they may never see that toy again?  Hence, the word "TUB TOYS."

*Realized that you can talk on the phone, type, chop veggies, pump gas, and blow dry your hair all with one arm (sometimes all at the same time) while balancing a sleeping child in the other arm?

*Looked in the mirror and gasped in horror at the disheveled, crazy-eyed stranger looking back at you?

*Asked "Good Lord, WHAT is that smell???"

If you answered YES to these questions, YOU ARE OFFICIALLY A PARENT!!

And, I wouldn't change it for anything!!

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